My friends,
I had not intended to discuss this controversial subject at this particular time. However, I want you to know that I do not shun controversy. On the contrary, I will take a stand on any issue at any time, regardless of how fraught with controversy it might be. You have asked me how I feel about whiskey. All right, here is how I feel about whiskey.
If when you say whiskey you mean the devil's brew, the poison scourge, the bloody monster, that defiles innocence, dethrones reason, destroys the home, creates misery and poverty, yea, literally takes the bread from the mouths of little children; if you mean the evil drink that topples the Christian man and woman from the pinnacle of righteous, gracious living into the bottomless pit of degradation, and despair, and shame and helplessness, and hopelessness, then certainly I am against it.
But, if when you say whiskey you mean the oil of conversation, the philosophic wine, the ale that is consumed when good fellows get together, that puts a song in their hearts and laughter on their lips, and the warm glow of contentment in their eyes; if you mean Christmas cheer; if you mean the stimulating drink that puts the spring in the old gentleman's step on a frosty, crispy morning; if you mean the drink which enables a man to magnify his joy, and his happiness, and to forget, if only for a little while, life's great tragedies, and heartaches, and sorrows; if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it.
This is my stand. I will not retreat from it. I will not compromise.
-Then-Representative Noah S. "Soggy" Sweat, Jr., delivered before the Mississippi House of Representatives in 1952 during a debate regarding the legalization of alcohol.
Posted by Emily at April 29, 2004 10:13 AM | TrackBack (0) |Always loved that speech. I'm only surprised he wasn't from Massachussetts.
Posted by: Ken Summers, Honorary Jew at April 29, 2004 10:57 AM"if you mean that drink, the sale of which pours into our treasuries untold millions of dollars, which are used to provide tender care for our little crippled children, our blind, our deaf, our dumb, our pitiful aged and infirm; to build highways and hospitals and schools, then certainly I am for it."
Uh oh!
Usually I'm a Bushmill drinker, complete with tax stamp. However, the BEST wiskey I have ever had the pleasure to quaff was moonshine liberated from the evidence locker of a rural Georgia county courthouse. Three mayonaise jars sans tax stamps, just waxpaper seals. Talk about smooth. Talk about good!
Chainy
Make mine Powers.
Posted by: Dan at April 29, 2004 02:06 PMi used to get some good moonshine in virgina...ah, the headaches
Posted by: Mr. Bingley at April 30, 2004 04:31 AM[sigh] And there's the story of alcohol in four pithy paragraphs.
You know the funny thing? They used to call beer the drink of moderation, and the original temperence movement embraced beer and wine and merely contented itself to work on getting people not to drink hard liquor.
Posted by: Dean Esmay at May 2, 2004 04:12 AMAnd Dean's comment accurately characterizes the evolution of nearly ever do-gooder movement in history.
Posted by: Ken Summers, Honorary Jew at May 3, 2004 06:20 AMA slight tangent: that comparison of the virtues of beer and the vices of hard liquor make for a great, hilarious satirical look at 18th-century England in William Hogarth's paintings: for example, Beer Street is (relatively) orderly, while Gin Lane is utter chaos.
Posted by: Dave J at May 3, 2004 02:34 PM